What doesn’t kill us makes us stronger and more angry AKA long winded ramble is long winded ramble!

I recently had something open my eyes more so than any other situation, writing, thought or video could. I had a person who I considered family walk away because I chose to speak the truth. I talked about how I felt, what I saw and what I deemed so right there in everyone’s face. I dared ask questions, call people out and hold those around me to standards of honesty and fairness. We tried having a discussion afterwards and it resorted to her calling trigger and stating that my views of certain things were “troubling”. I realized after that I was not gonna get any where with her and realized I was wrong. What was I wrong about? The very existence of NAFALT. Now I know that NAFALT is bullshit. Yes they are, they ALL are! And yet I wanted to believe otherwise. Why, because of her. I considered her my sister. I considered her someone who WAS all about equality. She isn’t though and I am an honest adult who can admit when I am wrong.

Long before I started to openly speak about what I saw I was I guess what you would say neutral. When we were first getting to know each other I knew of her activism and her days learning about “gender studies” (or as I like to call it feminism brainwashing). I wanted to believe she was a good person so with that I assumed those things were good. I mean good people don’t make hateful mistakes, right? Yeah. I know. But I wanted so bad to believe this I lied to myself.

I was, at the time blind to the truth about feminism. I assumed feminism was a good thing but didn’t find it to be needed any longer. I mean we are all equal people, right? I was right about one thing! I wasn’t a feminist myself and identified more as an old fashioned lady with trad views and expectations. I considered myself someone who celebrated my fiance’s chivalrous behavior and stated I had no expectations of those actions, only admiration. I know now how wrong I was. Even though I stated I did not expect chivalry from any man I did equate his worth of a human and his being a good person to if he acted in such a way or not. I belonged to another site and found myself under constant fire from rad fems as a result. They shouted how chivalry was an insult to women. I shouted that chivalry is respect to women. I slowly realized the whole debate focused on women, but what about men? I started to research things and that with a mixture of anger at insane feminists led me to GWW. I started to re-evaluate my views and pick them apart. I owned that, even though I said I admired men who were “gentlemen” it was more of an expectation. An expectation based on gender. That is wrong. I still wasn’t loud about things but I did start to change my views.

I continued to stand up for men in these discussions but instead of expecting them to be a certain way I stood up for them not being sexist pigs. I let them know that showing appreciation for the women in their lives in a way that is different than some like is ok. I let them know that they are not assholes or bad people for viewing things the way they did and they did not HAVE to do it if they didn’t want to. I noticed I was getting even more hate. How dare I speak up and tell men they are good people? How dare I speak about double standards in expectations based on gender and how unfair it is to expect things of men because of penis while crying about things being expected of you cause vagina? How dare I not tell men they are rapists or jerks or misogynists? The more hate I got the more angry I got. My love and I had never really talked about gender ideology or social views in that construct before. We never really said either way how we viewed feminism. I remember the first time I said something. I was scared. I recall telling him I might sound like a bad person before saying I thought feminism was bullshit. I swear to god I saw nothing but fucking relief across his face. We spent at least an hour agreeing with each other. I can not begin to say how relieved I was too!

My anger only continued to grow as I heard more and more bullshit. hashtags like kill all men, people saying die cis scum and the ever silencing method of telling men about their privilege when ever they spoke. These are things said to good men, good men like my fiance, my best friend, my brothers. These are men who I care about and love and who’s problems are real. These are men who I have great respect for, who have been there for me and who I want to be there for. I want nothing more than to one day marry the love of my life officially. We already consider each other bonded for life and I hope every day to be a wonderful best friend, partner in life and cheerleader for him and all he does. To me he is my life, my love, my everything. To feminists he is a problem, a rapist, an asshole. I know there are other amazing men like him and as I continue to speak I meet more and more of them along with amazing women who also see men as individual people instead of a collective oppressive unit.

I began to speak openly and angrily. She ignored it. I told her outright and she plugged her ears and wouldn’t listen. She told me that it wasn’t that I was anti feminist, it was that I disagreed with the loud crazy ones but that no woman could be against feminism and proceeded to tell me all about her feminist, GLBT and racial activism. By that point I realized I wasn’t going to get any where and just waited for the bullshit to be over. I was mad, not gonna lie. But I didn’t see the point in arguing. Some people don’t want to hear things and no matter how many times you say it they will excuse it away and tell you why you are wrong. I didn’t let that deter me though and kept saying what I say. I know she didn’t like it and so was the beginning of the end of our sisterhood.

The number one thing I regret now is letting her silence me. I let her think she could tell me who I am and what I agree. I also regret not telling her sooner. Above all though, I regret that this has caused my love pain too. She was his sister too and her temper tantrum has caused him some negative feelings. I now know I needed to see this and I don’t know, may he did too. I needed to see first hand that NAFALT isn’t reality. All feminists ARE like that. They can’t handle logic, reality or criticism. She always touted herself as someone who valued honesty, even if it was harsh. Hell, especially when it was harsh! She sure dished it to me once or twice. I thought she could also take it and boy, was I wrong. She sure can be a bitch and yet when you use a bit of her bitchy honesty back onto her she cries and shrivels up and shouts trigger! She also thought she could say she never diminished male rape/abuse victims all while doing exactly that. Yeah, she didn’t like being called out on that one either, let me tell you!

I learned the hard way to never give special treatment to others and to not ever lose sight of the truth. The truth is feminism is a hate movement. Would I let a loved one get away with joining the Neo Nazis? Would I let a loved one get away with murdering people, beating puppies or molesting children? Somethings are just bad, no matter what and we can’t let others get away with things because we want to believe them to be good people. Some people aren’t good and some people do bad things due to brain washing or a false way of thinking. Do I think she wants to believe that what she does is good? Yes I do. We all want to believe that. We have to hold ourselves accountable the same way we do others. We have to look for proof to validate if we are indeed doing the right thing. Anyone can say anything. Anyone can say a statement, an idea, a notion. We have to look to facts to back up those statements, ideas, notions. That is one of the many faults feminism has. It refuses to look at facts and chooses instead to create their own sudo-facts. And that is one of the many faults in individual feminists, the refusal to verify facts and ask for proof.

If there is any annoyance I have with people it is believing anything and everything. Taking a statement at face value and buying it because reasons. Question, research, demand proof. If you parrot without a single question you have given away your mind to cultish thinking and I will ALWAYS point that out when I see it! I was there once and yet I still can’t understand people who sell their brains so fucking easily!


Trigger warning: this involves trigger warnings ; P

Fucking god I am so sick of trigger warnings. I am sure some who might read this find that horrible. Ok. Not really gonna do anything about that. So, why might I hate them, you may wonder? They are insulting, demeaning and giving me a trigger warning is pretty much saying “since you probably can’t handle life, speech, thought or well, anything that isn’t kittens and rainbows and butterflies here is a warning to wrap yourself in a fucking blanket. Eat some cookies, color in a Sesame Street coloring book and get a back rub.” SERIOUSLY??!!?? Fuck that. For all this talk of not needing to be protected and be strong independent women these fucking feminists sure as fuck act like 4 year olds. Actually no, I worked with 4 year olds they handled their shit better than these chics do! They asked questions, they said things calmly and they FUCKING LISTENED TO REASON! Seriously I can’t take any of them seriously any more. And I mean ANY OF THEM!

Ok, now that I got that off my chest ; ) Now I am sure some people are pissed. *shrug* ok. I have PTSD, I have anxiety. I was abused and have triggers. Fuck, I just found a trigger a few days ago and without control there I was shaking, hyper ventilating and crying. My fiance had said something and I could not handle it. I wasn’t angry with him at all. He did nothing wrong. He had no fucking clue. Despite barely being able to breath I told him that too. I refused to punish him for not knowing something even I didn’t know. Have I been raped? No, I had a threat that scared me (not on line, in person on a bus) so can I speak personally about rape? No I can’t. I am not gonna lie here. I don’t know everything. Who does though? I talk to other survivors (I hate the word victim) who all handle things very differently. Shit, what can you expect? We are all different people.

I know for me and many others when it comes to our PTSD, anxiety etc we bounce back. We don’t want to be babied. We WANT to be mentally healthy and work towards that goal. Trigger warnings are not gonna fucking get us there. Treating us like a helpless baby is hurting us, not helping us! Now I am not gonna claim I am always resilient and can handle the world. Sometimes I crack. I have other emotional crap going on too. Hell, I have other problems in general. I am doing everything I can to work through it all. Even when I crack I don’t want to be babied. I want to take some time, recoup and bounce back with my boxing gloves on.

So with this I say Feminists: Stop saying women are strong then treating them like they are frail little helpless things. If anything is sexist as fuck it is that. Stop being a fucking hypocrite!

And, if you don’t believe me, will you believe Christina Hoff Sommers? Yeah probably not cause you don’t like facts, do you? ; )      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hC7Ii1I8wx0

My friends, no answers? REALLY???

I have, over the last few days asked on my personal Facebook wall for my friends (most of them being feminists) to explain. Explain how feminism is helping falsely accused men when women lie and point the fingers yelling rape. I asked how is comparing men to animals and saying they should be killed ok? I asked and, I admit, I hoped for answers. I asked and hoped for action. I asked for a feminist, ANY feminist to fight for the guy who had a woman break into his house, sexually assault him and then, for reasons I can not even begin to fathom she was released. I knew there would be silence. I knew there would be not a single action. I can see right through feminism’s bullshit. I wanted to be wrong though. Desperately I begged to be wrong. I wasn’t.

If someone had proven me wrong I would have celebrated. I would have probably went out to buy a fedora (I will eventually buy one along with a few other things just to annoy those easily annoyed but that is a tangent right there so…) just to eat it. I don’t think I need any more proof that feminism is NOT about equality than that. It is one thing for nameless cunts to spout words of hate but my friends, people who I cherish to so blatantly ignore is a head shaker. So yes, to my friends who label themselves as feminists. To ALL OF YOU: be angry with me. hate me. I don’t care. I am fully fucking disappointed in you. I gave you a chance, many in fact, to prove me wrong. I have always said you were smart and amazing people. You have let a cult brain wash you. You have let a cult tell you things that are wrong. You have turned yourselves into those other loud hateful assholes screaming about killing people. I could not be more ashamed right now.

Attraction, preferences and shaming: Are they all really the same thing?

I am sick of hearing about the double standards revolving around men, women and attraction. Now come on, we ALL have preferences. Things we like in who ever we are attracted to and things that we, well, don’t like. I see all over the place girls (and yes, if you are some snotty little feminist princess you ARE a girl, even if you 40 or 50) going on about wanting to find men with 6 pack abs who slave over them and have a fat wallet. Cause damn dem neck beards *eye roll*. Yet in the same space I see men being yelled at and insulted for stating what they are attracted to. Maybe they want curves or like larger racks since they are a “breast guy” (and fuck, I get it cause tits are AWESOME). Hell, I have even seen guys talk about wanting someone who loves going to the gym or hiking being yelled at. Heaven forbid someone wants someone as a life partner who enjoys what they enjoy *scoff*. And yes, I am aware of the oddness of this coming from a fat chic. When most fat chics are out there wanting society to validate their taco eating I am simply saying this “You do not have to be attracted to me. Please give me basic human respect and don’t try to bully me but you do not have to lie to me and tell me what you think I want to hear. I will respect you, please respect me.”

I don’t expect the world to protect, coddle or praise me. No one should. And yet there are the fucking loud mouthed harpies screeching their lungs out about a fucking ad they don’t like. SHUT THE FUCK UP! I don’t care. I really don’t care if some stupid ad offended you. Why? Because you are choosing to be offended. You chose to get butt hurt and threaten them with bombs just like I chose to eat pizza for dinner last night. We make choices and we have to own them. And people have the right to be honest about if your choices match or don’t match with their choices. Seriously, get over yourself you stupid bitches!

Do I have a problem with men or women being attracted to thin people? Fuck no. Why would I? I have no plans to date a million people so why the ever loving fuck would I care if a bunch of people are not attracted to me? I found that man who is. He is who I want. In other words, ya’ll don’t matter ; P I mean, I love you guys in a basic human way like how I love all skittles but fucking christ on a cracker I am not asking to play hopscotch on your genitals so it is all good, right?

Now, as for shaming, I am really getting sick of that word. I do really need to make a list of words I am sick of. People shout that constantly at stupid shit then turn around in the same sentence and FUCKING SHAME SOMEONE. I pretty much always see this from feminists. Ya know “How dare you call me a fat bitch you stupid loser neck beard misogynistic asshole?” Yeah, good job you fucking immature little shit for brains! hypocrisy is not exclusive to feminism but they sure do drain that shit for all it is worth!

Hi my name is Geeky and I am a cunt!

I feel it customary to, for my first blog post, introduce myself. You will probably not like me and that is ok. I like it that way ; D

I am, in the rawest form a sassy, rude and funny bitch! I am short, fat and more than ok with that. I am disabled and (some people think anyways) surprisingly positive considering how my body decides to behave sometimes. I am lucky to have found the love of my life in the most amazing and brilliant man on this planet. So yeah, every time some woman some where bitches about where is a good guy my response is “I got lucky enough to some how attract him!”. Yep, not sorry ladies and gents. ; P

I am incredibly geeky and have been since before I can remember. I enjoy science, history and I am learning about electronics. I appreciate debates on religion, ethics and the complicated topic of human nature. I love psychology, astronomy and archaeology. I love tattoos (have 5 so far and more planned), geek t.shirts and cos playing. I read comic books, appreciate nerd tube and would live at conventions if I could. I spend a lot of time playing games with my friends ( most of them guys) while watching others play games (gameception, nerds!). I am obsessed with Minecraft. I love how it can be a canvas as well as a game. I do a lot of building and, as many have said when coming over to my base you need the shades with all the neon colors (modded for the win).

I always considered myself an open minded hippy liberal. I am pansexual, atheist and open to other peoples “alt” lifestyles. However, despite my feelings not changing in a lot of areas I am starting to feel a divide. Pretty much all of my friends identify as moderate to radical feminists, you see and, well, I am incredibly ANTI feminist. So, what am I? What do I believe? I am an egalitarian but I also use anti feminist as part of my identifier (as you probably noticed up above). Why, might you ask? I don’t just see feminism as something I don’t agree with but as a hate movement that is starting a very hostile and very dangerous gender war. I have seen a lot of things in my life, all 32 years of it, and I can not in good conscience stay silent. A lot of the awesome people in my life are men, cis gendered white hetero men at that. These are men who are amazing people who I look up to so much. I feel if I were to support such bullshit and such silencing tactics I would be spitting in their faces. I can’t do that.

I will get more into my views on feminism, the problems it causes and other shit later. Trust me, you will probably tell me to shut up after awhile. Just know, I won’t ; D.

Besides that I am a former teacher who loves kids. I am an immature little shit (sometimes, not all the time) who loves to color and has a stuffed Buzz Lightyear. I am a writer, a dreamer, and cynically angry loud mouth. I day dream crazy and I argue logically. I love tootsie pops. I want a pet hedge hog and love llamas. I watch Despicable Me when I am feeling like shit. I don’t think anything is sexier than when my honey talks tech. I am bound to say something that pisses you off. I laugh a lot and loud as hell.

So hi, my name is Geeky. Nice to meet you!